Feather Roads
by Mad-Hamlet
Summary: The Third Arc in Spectrums. Good times they come a'calling. Revel in these moments children.
1. Water

Disclaimer: All this belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc. (Grrr...arrrg)  
  
  
  
Drain Brameged Inc. Proudly Presents  
  
A Mad-Hamlet Production  
  
We walk the roads that fate lays before us. More often than we'd like that path is strewn with blades and teeth. Shadows with claws that try to gut us from within, most of us struggle foward, over, under, through all these obstecles hoping, even in the face of all evidence, that we'll be stronger for it.  
  
On occasion, through mercy, or mayhaps the whim of Gods needing entertainment, allow Fate's way to be softened. Cool breezes flow over our skin, all the living things around seem to be talking to us and our existance is not only possible but worthwile. The road is soft and comfortable and we can rest as we journy onward, wounds heal, blood stops and strength returns..just so we can face the next shadowy terror with a far too wide, sharp, grin just around the corner.  
  
On occasion we're gifted with Feather Roads. This is theirs.  
  
  
  
Feather Roads  
  
Water  
  
  
  
"Pool party!" She said flopping down on the sofa next to me.  
  
I tossed the movie video we had rented for that evening back on the table, missed and let it flop to the floor.  
  
"Hey hey," Xander protested making a grab for the cassete. "That's no way to treat a classic."  
  
"I would hesitate to file 'Animal House' under the classics." I replied.  
  
Xander reverently dusted the tape off before gingerly setting it back on the table. "Philisitine" He muttered.  
  
"Pool party!" She insisted again.  
  
"An excellent idea Willow." Xander said sitting back on the floor. The three of us were sitting in my living room. Me, lounging in the corner of the sofa, Willow had dropped onto it's opposite corner and Xander lay on the floor with his legs up resting his feet in the space between us.  
  
"However certain factors prevent the possibility of a pool party, lack of said pool being on the top of my list." He finished.  
  
"Not a wiggworthy problem." Willow said, shoving his feet off the sofa with her own and then resting them in my lap. "There's the public pool."  
  
"The public pool?" Xander sputtered. "What you mean lair of the beautiful people, denizen of the fasionable ones? Those who's layers of skin cream, bronzed tans, state of the art sunglassess and gortex laden speedos with personalities of such shallowness that even Cordelia, at her worst, would still define them as 'Tacky'?"  
  
"That was in high school Xander." Willow said. " We just finished our first semeseter of collage. I'm sure they've matured just like Cordelia did. Foot rub..please?" This last bit was addressed to me. I let out a breath as one unfairly put upon but moved to comply. Willow purred as my fingers kneaded the muscles of her arch.  
  
Xander seemed to think about that for a minute. "You might have a point my Willow shaped friend. I'm sure they've matured, achieved their true potential. The finally reached their lifelong ambitions and we have little to fear from their ilk now."  
  
"Mmm.. so you think finally became respectful adults then." Willow asked. Her dubious tone implied she didn't belive that possibility for a second and me, knowing Xander, didn't either.  
  
"I think they became maniquins actually." Xander quipped.  
  
"Well.. either way, being mature adults, or plastic manquins, they're not a problem so...Pool Party!" Willow truimphantly smiled. Pleased at her logic.  
  
Xander opened his mouth, raising his hand imperiously to reply and froze. Maybe he was mulling over Willow's argument, not finding any weakness's he remained like that.  
  
"Bang. Yer dead." I said. "Willow-Logic defeats Xander-Witt. Flawless victory."  
  
"Yay me!" Willow crowed. "We'll go get the swimsuits... after Buffy finishes my footrub."  
  
Xander stood up. "Kay then, pool party it is. I'll head back to ..the basement, grab a suit. Meet you back here in thirty?"  
  
I nodded slaving over Wiccan toes. Willow just mumbled something about escaping the horror of Jim Belushi pretending to be a zit.  
  
Xander headed for the front door. "You've only postponed the inevitable." He said. "You will be Belushi's..oh yes. You will be his." and shut the door behind him.  
  
Two seconds later he poked his head back in the room and managed one small victory.  
  
"I'll give Anya a call. We'll see the you two wackies in a bit okay?" Then shut the door before Willow's cusionany projectile of doom could impact with his face. I didn't say anything, I'm just a footrubber.  
  
  
  
An hour later Anya and Xander walked through the front door. He had switched his jeans for a 'high school' Xander hawaian printed pair of swim trunks, he seemed somewhat proud of that. Anya came in behind him, wearing what some might term a 'Bikini'. Atop her head she had a large, wide brimmed straw hat. She was also wearing sunglasses.  
  
The total effect made me think that someone had convinced June Cleaver to pose for Playboy.  
  
"I got a new swimsuit!' Anya declared happily doing a slow three- sixty. "What do you think?"  
  
It was white, and I had no intention of mentioning what that would mean as soon as she jumped in the water. With minimal amount of coverage, the tiny pieces of fabric that were supposed to, I guess, allow for modesty were connected by very thing golden pieces of string. String that looked like it had the tensile strength of tissue paper.  
  
"I think when you take it off it'll shrink to the size of a gum wrapper." I said. Willow nodded.  
  
"As facinating as the topic of my girlfriends swimsuit is.." Xander interupted.  
  
"You don't think my swimsuit is facinating?" Anya interupted him while giving this really..quite effective set of puppy dog eyes actually.  
  
"Uh..." Ah.. it's not everday that you see someone with Xander's capacity for witt become flustered.  
  
I leaned over and whispered "I treasure these moments." to Willow. She giggled and reached up to cup my cheek, storking it with her fingers a few times before letting me go.  
  
"Tell ya what Babe." Xander had recovered. "Let's all head to the pool and we'll talk more about your suit when we get there." He turned to us. "Sound good to you guys?"  
  
I imagined what would happen as soon as Anya jumped in the water...  
  
"Sure." I chirupped.  
  
"Yeah." Willow said catching my eye. She'd read my mind. "That'll be an..intresting conversation."  
  
"You got your suits?" Xander asked.  
  
Willow patted her backpack that was lying besider her.  
  
"Then lets go hit the pool campers!" Xander said motioning over his shoulder with a thumb. "Cars waiting."  
  
"Ooo! Limo service!" Willow said.  
  
"Actually, ten year old, with questionable breaks Cadilac service..but who's asking?" Xander said.  
  
"I got shotgun!" Anya shouted.  
  
I gave Xander a look.  
  
"Relax." He held up his hands in mock surrender. "She knows exactly what that means and is not actually expecting to get a shotgun!"  
  
And we went to the pool.  
  
  
  
"Welcome to the Void." Xander intoned in a hollow voice as we came to the actual pool. Willow and I had changed into our own suits in the womans locker room. She was wearing a very unWillowlike two piece, like many of her clothes these days, it was a deep red in color. Almost mauve. Mine was a simple bikini as well, blue.  
  
Alright, alright, Willow picked it out for me last time we went shopping.  
  
"Void?" Anya asked, her eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. "I thought this was a swimming pool not the edge of reality where no demon would think of going." She paused. "Though we did use to dare each other to do it all the time. That's how we lost Zürigiol, idiot never could turn down a challenge."  
  
I took a few seconds to process that.  
  
"There's a Void?" I asked.  
  
"Sure." Anya replied. "Where did you think entropy came from? You think things just..run down on their own?"  
  
"Well... yeah." Willow said. "I mean don't they?"  
  
Anya gave a disdainful snort and shook her head. I think she muttered something about 'mortal thinking' but she was too quiet to make out exactly.  
  
"I, myself, was actually referring to the shallow nature of those normally to be found here and their lack of mental prowess." Xander said.  
  
"Oh look, a swimming pool." Willow said. "That's why we're here right? To swim? Not expose secrets of the universe that I'd really be happy not knowing?"  
  
"Sure thing girlfriend." I said. "Let's go claim us some tacky orange lawnchairs and risk a serious case of melonoma."  
  
I was rewarded with a smile from Willow.  
  
"Uh.. all I want is a nice tan." Anya piped up.  
  
We walked around the pool looking for a free set of chairs, or a table, or something. The pool was large, Olympic sized easily. Along one side, ours, was the back of the large buillding that held the other services one could get here. Racket ball courts, sauna's, even tanning booths if, for some insane reason, the eternaly sunny weather of Sunnydale wasn't enough for a person. Across from us was a small field, set up there were four vollyball courts. The largest concentration of lawn chairs was on that side, a few had umbrellas to hide fromt the sun if we wanted.  
  
Many, many, many, biki laden girls sat, all were facing the vollyball courts watching as many, many speedo laden young men, all with perfect hair and teeth it seemed, tried to impress ladies by making mad dives after volleyballs where it would have been more effective, gamewise, to simply walk under the thing and hit it back.  
  
Willow saw me giving all the young men a dersive sneer but I caught the amusment flashing across her face.  
  
"Don't. Say. A. Word. Wiccan mine." I growled.  
  
"Ah Buffy, you can stop my words but not my thoughts." She giggled.  
  
"I hear anything about 'Men, who needs them' and someone is going to be in serious trouble." I warned.  
  
"I need men." Anya added, trying to fit in I guess.  
  
"Hey!" Xander protested.  
  
"Uh, I mean I need Xander type men." She amended.  
  
"So you'd be happy with a clone?" Xander demanded.  
  
"How would I know the diffrence?" Anya countered.  
  
"Well..you just should!" Xander continued.  
  
Willow had found an available table and she and I sat down, there were two more open seats but Xander and Anya, caught up in their 'debate' missed the fact that we had stopped and continued walking away from us.  
  
"They're scary." Willow said.  
  
"Yeah, but we love em' anyway." I replied.  
  
"Sunscreen?" Willow offered.  
  
"You rub my back I'll rub yours." I said.  
  
"Deal."  
  
"Swim now or later?" I asked.  
  
Willow pondered for a few seconds before grabbing one of the umbrellas and pulling it over so she was protected from the sun.  
  
"I wanna watch you swim." She proclaimed.  
  
I looked from my search through her backpack for the sunscreen. "Can we say that one more time for those in our live audiance who didn't quiet catch it?"  
  
"Please?" Willow said giving me a set of puppy dog eyes that Anya never could contend with.  
  
"Sure, yeah..okay." I shrugged. "Why not? Can I ask why though?"  
  
"Would you believe because I want to think I have a mermaid?" She asked.  
  
"Bzzz..wrong answer, thank you for playing though." I said. I was still looking for the damn sunscreen. How much stuff could she put in this bag anyway? "C'mon Wills, fess up."  
  
Willow looked away from me, drumming her fingers on the table. Finally after a few seconds she glanced back at me. "Promise not to laugh?" She asked.  
  
I reached across the table and stopped her drumming fingers by taking her hand in mine.  
  
"I'd never laugh at you." I said. "Unless you remind of that one time in the dorm where..."  
  
"No no no no. No reminding of that. Never, nope. Uh-uh!" Willow interupted, pulling her hand from mine. I could see a blush begining to glow on her cheeks. She's such fun to tease sometimes. "I'll talk, I'll talk. Just don't mention that ever again. Okay?"  
  
"Deal." I said. Resting my elbows on the table I held my face in my hands. "So what's up?"  
  
"This is probably stupid." Willow grumbled. "But...remember when we did that spell so you could kick Adam's butt."  
  
"A butt that deserved a good kicking, and kicked it was too." I said. "Considering it was less than a month ago, I remember it well."  
  
"Yeah..well.. " Willow paused. "We all became part of you Buffy. Or..I mean..we all came together but.."  
  
"But?" I prompted.  
  
"I'm ..kinda jealous." She finally whispered.  
  
"What?" I could feel a burst of the giggles coming on but I fought it down. I had promised after all.  
  
"I'm jealous." Willow pouted. A Willow pout is lethal at close range if not defused quickly, and being in a public place the usual Pout- Disarmament techniques were not available.  
  
"Jealous of what?" I asked.  
  
"That..I dunno." Willow shrugged. "We're together and now everyone got to be a part of you. I just wanna see you swim okay? Something for me..just for me."  
  
"But..you have things from just me that no one else ever had, or ever will." I replied.  
  
"Yeah..yeah that's true. I just want to see you swim okay? Just..indulge me? MMmmm?"  
  
Willow can be incredibly sultry without even knowing it, her eyes don't half close giving her an air of mystery, nor can she do a convincing sultry purr. Her attempts have usually ended up with us both giggling on the floor after a fierce pillow fight. But.. sometimes..the light hits her hair just the right way, or she looks at you with just the hint of an impish smile and, well, I at least suddenly find myself willing to bend over backwards for her.  
  
Then Xander and Anya showed.  
  
Xander looked somewhat shamefaced and was holding four ice creams treats.  
  
"Feeling somewhat foolish for not noticing that my bestest buddies had sat down," He said. "I decided to treat the treats with treats."  
  
"Ooo! Slushy!" Willow said grabbing the offered goodie.  
  
Anya took her ice cream as well. "I thought you said you'd give me lots of..."  
  
"ICE CREAM!" Xander said loudly. "That's right Anya, you can have all the ice cream you want."  
  
"You're so sweet." Anya purred and she leaned toward me whispering. "I knew he'd do that. He was just worried about me saying 'orgasm'." She looked over her shoulder where Xander was trying to get Willow to give him a taste of her slushy.  
  
"C'mon Willow.."  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"Nope."  
  
"Have I told you how much of a bestest buddy you are?" Xander said.  
  
"Yep, and as my bestest buddy you should know nothing gets between me and a grape flavored  
  
yummy." Willow replied.  
  
"Aww.."  
  
"If you wanted grape so badly you shouldn't have gotten yourself strawberry!"  
  
"Anya says I taste better with strawberry flavoring." Xander griped.  
  
"Kay, you taste better for Anya and I'll enjoy my grape flavored slushy." Willow said.  
  
"Belushi will be my vengence upon thee."  
  
"Still not getting any grape slushy." Willow crowed.  
  
"Oh...poopy." Xander grouched; sat down in his chair, and nibbled fornlornly on the strawberry flavored goodie.  
  
"He really is a sweetie." Anya whispered to me. I looked at Willow busily devouring her own ice cream.  
  
"Yeah." I said with a nod. "She is..."  
  
I watched Willow for a few minutes.  
  
"Hey! Xander damnit, you can't have any of my grape slushy either!" And I yanked it away from him, yay Slayer strength.  
  
"Man!" Xander grumbled.  
  
  
  
We sat in companaible silence for a few a while, just eating our ice cream. I finished first even though Willow had a good head start. I just can't resist a grape flavored ice cream treat I suppose..  
  
Tossing the paper cone into a trash can I stood and declared. "I'm going swimming."  
  
Anya stood up beside me. "So am I." She said.  
  
I sat back down. "I'll watch." I said.  
  
Anya gave me an odd look before shrugging, "Suit yourself." she said and walked toward the edge of the pool.  
  
"And if you're lucky, your suit will still be suiting you after you dive." I muttered. "Literally."  
  
"Say what Buffy?" Xander asked. Anya reached the edge of the deep end and prepared to dive.  
  
"Xander, you do know that white swimming suits are usually transparent when they get wet don't you?" Willow asked.  
  
Anya raised her arms over her head.  
  
Xander took a moment too digest this informaion.  
  
"Ah hell," He said. "I knew I forgot something. Anya!"  
  
Anya jumped.  
  
Nice dive.  
  
She made an very small splash.  
  
There were a few small bubbles.  
  
All of us leaned foward to get a better view of Anya surfacing. Willow had a mischivious grin, Xander was looking increasingly nervous as the seconds ticked past. Not having a mirror I'm not sure what I looked like but it felt like a big ol'This is gonna be good' type grin; with teeth.  
  
Anya surfaced near the ladder and effortlessly clambered out of the water.  
  
Xander eyes's nearly popped out of his head and Willow gasped very loudly, then with a small shriek tried to hide under the table. I only rested my head in my hands and dearly wished I was somewhere else.  
  
"Xander!!" Anya whined. "I lost my top!"  
  
**  
  
I was so embarressed. Not for Anya, not because of what happened to her either. I mean, it happened to her, not me. So why was I diving under the table.  
  
Instinct I guess.  
  
So I'm scrabbling under the table and I can overhear what everyone's saying.  
  
"Anya put on my shirt." That was Xander.  
  
"But I lost my top." Anya was still whining. "It cost money!"  
  
"I'll get your suit but for now would you put on my damn shirt? Everyone's staring." Xander again. He was sounding a bit upset.  
  
"It's not my fault. The water..and bad workmanship. I didn't know! I'm going to write a letter to the company. It's their responsibility." Anya said.  
  
"Sounds like a plan babe, but please..hey..you! Yeah, you hormone boy, eyes sideways spud! Don't be starin' at the girl with no biki..just stop drooling okay?" Xander sounded like he was ready to pop.  
  
Buffy peeked beneath the table. "This pool party was your idea. Just bear that in mind." She whispered.  
  
"Inviting Anya was not part of the program." I protested then I said, pouting. "Just wanted to have some fun."  
  
"No worries babe." Buffy gave me a quick smile. "I'll deal." Then she vanished from sight.  
  
"I'll get the suit." I heard her say.  
  
'Hey.' I thought. 'I wanna see her go swimming!' Okay..so..I was obsessing.  
  
I poked my head back from under the table. No one was staring at me at least so I alkwardly got back into my seat.  
  
Xander had convinced his 'girlfriend' to wear his shirt. She was picking at the material.  
  
"It's..rough." She complained loudly.  
  
"You can get back into your suit as soon as we..get it." Xander patiently explained. "As long as you promise to not change back into it in public okay?"  
  
"Why?" Anya asked. "It's a little late to be modest isn't it? I mean, they already saw enough didn't they? Does it really matter?"  
  
"Yes." Xander said. "To me."  
  
"Why?" Anya asked again.  
  
"Because.." Xander shot me a look that was pleading for help. All I could do was shake my head and shrug. I wasn't going to ..couldn't have been able to assist in that discussion. Uh-uh no way.  
  
"Because no one should be allowed to see my girl except me." He finished. The way he flinched I guessed he thought that sounded kind of lame. I thought it was sweet myself. Anya must have also.  
  
"You're so nice." She suddenly purred and reached over to cup Xander's face. "So nice in fact that I'm going to let you.."  
  
I whimpered, and got ready to dive under the table again.  
  
"Buy me all the ice cream you want." Anya finished truimphantly. I think, I'm not sure but I think I saw her wink at me.  
  
"Ahem!" I heard Buffy behind me. I turned around in my seat. "Gonna get the top now." She announced.  
  
Xander, not having a clue of earlier conversation didn't really react much. I guess he was thanking his lucky stars that his girlfriend hadn't embarrased him in public again. He was looking heavenward regardless.  
  
"Thanks Buffy." He mumbled.  
  
I nodded.  
  
She jumped.  
  
I am definetly partial, so biased and pro-Buffy in my heart, that even if my head insisted otherwise, my heart would believe she eclipses the sun. Mm..that's a bit extreme but I ferverently believe she is of a level of peachy-keeness that I have yet seen to be equaled. Now was no exception.  
  
She bent her powerful legs and leaped into the air, love blinds sure, and how much of it was just love blinded eyes and how much of it was reality I'm not sure, nor am I caring.  
  
She arched through the air, warm sun reflecting off every strand of hair, skin with just the right amount of color so as not to burn but not be too dark, drinking in the warmth, muscle tone with just the right amount of softness to be attractive. She just hung in the air..perfect. And very, very real.  
  
All mine too.  
  
"CANNONBALL!!" Buffy screeched.  
  
Oh no.  
  
The resulting tidle wave crashed over me and I was soaked. I let out an outraged scream as cold water ran over me giving me a serious case of the jitters. My towel, my suit..my book. All covered in clorine laden pool water. Cold, clorine laded pool water.  
  
"Buffy!" I screeched. "You're gonna so get it!" I stalked to the edge of the pool waiting for her to surface.  
  
She broke the surface a second later flinging her hair in just the right way so more water crested up and splashed me.  
  
"Xander catch!" Buffy called and threw him a soggy piece of white material. He snatched it out the air.  
  
"We'll be right back." Xander called back to us as he and Anya went to the changing room. I noticed one young man leering at Ayana as they walked past him. Her arm shot out and with a shove he was launched off the edge into the pool.  
  
"You're rude." Anya declared but I wasn't really paying attention to that.  
  
No, my concentration was on another blonde who was treading water in the deep end of the public swimming pool smiling at me with a mischivious grin.  
  
"What's the matter sweetie?" Buffy murmered. "You said you wanted to see me swim, you just didn't say how."  
  
"Bufffffyyyy.." I growled.  
  
"Come and get me!" She dared.  
  
Hah, just because I dived under cover when an associate walked around topless she thought this witch would be afraid of all challenges.  
  
I dove in after her but she bolted. When I surfaced she was halfway across the pool.  
  
"Over here Willow!" She called. I took off after her. She was in the shallow end now and started running from me while I stuck with the front crawl. She let me catch her of course. There's no fun in chasing if you don't catch eventually.  
  
I did a surface dive as soon as she was within reach, wrapped my arms around her thighs, braced and pulled her legs out from under her. I saw her head a fuzzy blob but it was enough and I reached out and gently took her face in my hands and pulled her in for a quick aquatic smoochie. Then I pushed away and broke the surface laughing and swimming as fast as possible.  
  
Of course she overtook me in a heartbeat. Her arms wrapped around me from behind and she lifted me off my feet. She gave me a quick peck on the neck that no one could have seen since it looked like we were just playing, and whispered. "Teasing a Slayer is a no-no."  
  
"Buffy?" I asked.  
  
Then louder she sang. "Scuze me while I kiss the sky!"  
  
I think I must have said something along the lines of "WhoooaaaaAAAAHH!!" Cause with a toss, she hefted me ..up mostly.  
  
She was holding back, wouldn't do for a five foot five, uh..I'm not going to mention her wieght..college student to throw her best friend straight up a good twenty feet. No, I only made it up about six or so which, from my point of view, was high enough thanks ever so much.  
  
"Buuuffffyyyy!!" I screamed as the water came rushing up to meet me. I saw her, standing shoulder deep off the the side. She waved.  
  
After my splash down I sank to the bottom and plotted my revenge. Didn't have long to wait either. I closed my eyes to keep the clorine out and felt her arms grab me and a second later I was cradled in her arms.  
  
"Willow?" I heard her ask. She sounded nervous. I decided to not be THAT cruel as to scare her ..just unerve her a bit. I rolled out of her carry and splashed her in the face.  
  
"Gotcha!" I laughed.  
  
Buffy blinked a few times as water dripped from the few locks of hair plastered to her forehead.  
  
"You..you.." She sputtered. "You JERK! I was worried about you!!" And she retaliated. She cuppered her hands and swung em' a one-eighty..three inches below the surface of the pool.  
  
Can you say 'Tsunami'?  
  
The wave of water literally knocked me off my feet and I was so surprised that I got a mouthful of water and went under. I hadn't had time to take a breath either so I was floundering under the surface, I didn't have the presence of mind to simply stand up.  
  
Again I felt strong arms drag me to the surface and Buffy was holding me, yet again, like a babe in a cradle.  
  
"Oh God, oh hell..I'm sorry..I'm sorry." She rattled on. Only I can be called a babbler. "Willow, c'mon babe say something. You better not be faking again or you'll really be in trouble. Just please don't be in trouble now!"  
  
I coughed a few times and shook the water out my eyes.  
  
"Sunbathing." I gasped.  
  
  
  
"Right there, yes." I gasped. About ten minutes had passed between the two gasps, this one was resulting of Buffy, who still felt really guilty; something I was capatalising on like all get out, was giving me a vigiouros backrub while rubbing in a healthy coating of sunscreen. Hey, I'm a redhead, I burn easily.  
  
"Now my calves. C'mon..don't wimp out. You nearly did drown me." So I was feeling evil. Sue me.  
  
"You are enjoying this way too much. You know that don't you." Buffy said.  
  
I lifted my head and looked over my shoulder. "You betcha!" I said.  
  
"You are evil Wills." See?  
  
I put my head back down and just...sighed..in contentment. It felt so nice. Warm sun, warm skin, warm hands.. just..relaxed. Peace..calm.. quiet.... aaaahhh...  
  
"AaaaaaahhhHHHHH!!!!" I said. Or screamed actually. Xander stood over me with a bucket in his hand. The bucket was empty. The bucket had been full. It had been full of water.  
  
Cold water.  
  
Very cold water.  
  
Buffy had collapsed onto her back, laughing her sweet ass off. While Anya, who was sitting at our table, once again wearing her ..less than durable swimwear.. was giggling behind her hands.  
  
"Alexander Harris," I thundered scrambling to me feet. "You are a dead man!"  
  
Xander has an inborne ability for fast talk, passing the buck, dodging responsibility and moving out of harms way. This time, they all failed him.  
  
"Eeeep!" He said and ran. "It seemed like a good idea at the time!" He hollered over his shoulder.  
  
Instinct.. I knew what to do. 'Grab' it commanded and I did. Reached out..reaching, reaching...there. 'Wait' ' it said and I waited. Xander was running fast, he was right next to the edge.  
  
'Now' Instinct commanded, 'Pull'. And I pulled.  
  
Directly underneath his feet, I felt it, a small divot of earth buldged upward for just a split second, Xander lurched toward the pool, arms pinwheeling wildly seemed about to regain his balance, so I just pointed my finger in his general direction and gave the air in front of me a swift poke.  
  
"Nnooo faaaiiiirraaahhh!" Xander managed to cry before falling into the pool.  
  
Now it was my turn to laugh out loud as Xander swam back to the edge of pool and hoisted himself out. His shirt was plastered to him, defining his phyique. Anya wolf whistled.  
  
Buffy and I stared at her for a few seconds and she shrugged. "Well, construction workers always whistle at the girls." She said.  
  
"Ah." Buffy ah'ed. "Okay." She turned to me.  
  
"Willow," She said quietly. "Was that you using your powers for less than good intentions?"  
  
"Uh..." My brain jammed. "It was practice?" I offered feebly.  
  
"Naughty, naughty witch." Buffy curled her fingers so they looked a bit like talons. "Tickle monsters gonna getcha!"  
  
"Oh no no no no no. Tickling bad. Please no, not tickle monster, tickle monster is bad enough but tickle monster in public? In front of everyone? That's real bad, I won't do it again! Promise, cross my ..er..star of david my heart..whatever. No tickle monster here, not in front of people. Nope, no, please. Anything but that."  
  
Mouth reports to central command that 'Babbling' is a go.  
  
Xander approached me from the other side peeling off his shirt. Anya whistled again and shouted something like, "Take it all off baby!" but I was too far gone into a full blow 'We have a possbility of Embarrasing Behaviore in Public Place at Willow's expense' based panic attack to take full notice.  
  
Xander walked over to us and shook his head violently splashing all of us.  
  
I didn't mind that much as I was already cold but Buffy and Anya object with vehement shrieks of dissaproval.  
  
"There." Xander said, hands on his hips. "Now we're even."  
  
"Ticklemonster him." I said pointing.  
  
"Good idea." Anya backed me up.  
  
"Get em' girls!" Buffy hollered.  
  
Xander turned to run. He didn't make it one step.  
  
  
  
Five minutes later we all collapsed on the grass exhausted. Xander had stopped begging for mercy about two minutes into the ticklefest and was now gasping for air as Anya clucked over him. Occasionally jabbing him in the side which launched him into a fresh bout of chortling.  
  
Buffy pulled herself upright and straightened out her towel. "Your turn with the subscreen." She said.  
  
"But all mine got washed off." I griped.  
  
"Poor baby. Karma, using your witchy powers for selfish reasons. You're gonna burn." She looked up at the overhead sun. "Literally."  
  
"Meanie." I stuck my tounge out at her.  
  
"Don't do that unless you ..ah skip it." Buffy rested her head on her arms.  
  
"But I like innduendo. Really." I whispered.  
  
"Too tired." Buffy sighed.  
  
"Not tonight honey I have a headache?" I asked while pouring a healthy quality of sunscreen into my hands.  
  
"For cliché violation you should be shot. Oh, that's nice." She said as I began rubbing her shoulder blades.  
  
"You sure about that death sentence?" I whispered to her. I moved my hands up and pushed away her hair and exposed her neck. I rubbed in some of the lotion and was rewared with a purr.  
  
"Sentence altered on grounds of new evidence." She whimpered.  
  
"Like what?" I whispered back.  
  
"Magic hands." She hissed as I massaged the tension out of her.  
  
"Love you." I said.  
  
"Recieved and reciprocated." Her voice died away.  
  
"Buffy?" I whispered.  
  
Silence was the answer, she was asleep.  
  
Well.. this was fine, who was going to put the sunscreen on me now?  
  
**  
  
I groggily woke up and looked around. Xander and Anya were snoozing themselves together on a towel a few feet away. Well actually Anya was on the towel, Xander was just..half on, half off.  
  
I sat up and blinked a few times.  
  
"Hiya." Willow said behind me.  
  
"Hey." I said and stood up and stretched.  
  
"Stretch anymore and we'll be having an Anya flashback." Willow says.  
  
I turned around, she was seated at the table wearing Anya's straw hat and sunglasses and reading her book.  
  
I grabbed a chair and sat down. "How long was I out?" I asked.  
  
"Bout an hour." She said. "You looked so cute I decided to let you stay that way. I even went so far as soothe you when you began saying embarrasing things in your sleep."  
  
I froze, I was pretty sure she was just joking but Willow has pointed out on several occasion that I do seem to mumble sometimes. She keeps threatening to record them.  
  
"You're kidding." I said.  
  
She just smiled and shook her head. I slumped foward and rested my head in my hands.  
  
"Oh Gods, what did I say now?" I moan.  
  
"Not tellin'." She declared. "But," And she held up a finger, "I will say that you have a vivid imagination."  
  
I groaned again and slumped even lower.  
  
"I mean, who ever would have thought of putting whipped cream on their pizza?" Willow said.  
  
"What?" I perked up. "I talked about food?"  
  
"Yep." Willow nodded. "And as we are on that subject I'm getting kinda hungry."  
  
"Yeah, me too." I said sitting upright. "What say we bail and snag a pizza for the movies?"  
  
"No whipped cream though." Willow wagged her finger in warning.  
  
"No whipped cream I promise." I paused. "But I still want pineapples."  
  
Willow rolled her eyes and said. "Go wake up those two and we can go okay?"  
  
  
  
A few minutes later we were heading for Xander's car where it was parked. Xander and Anya were walking in front of us and Anya herself was eating another ice cream that she insisted Xander buy for her, despite our assurances we had lots back at my place. Guess she wanted to make sure he'd give her all the..er...ice cream she wanted.  
  
Willow was walking beside me, we had both changed out of our swimwear though she still had on Anya's hat. She let out a heavy sigh.  
  
"What's up?" I said. "You got to see me swim y'know."  
  
"Yeah." She mumbled. "But what I really wanted to have happen didn't."  
  
"And what would that have been?" I asked.  
  
"Well..it's kinda cheesy but.." She leanded foward with a conspiratory smile and whispered. "I was kinda hoping some studdmuffin would come and try to pick you or me up and we could blow him off by doing smoochies or something. Shock em' real good and all his friends would laugh at him. Then he'd call us rude names and you could beat him up to defend your girlfriend's honor."  
  
I gave Willow a look.  
  
"You're strange." I said.  
  
"Darn tootin!" 


	2. City

Disclaimer: All this belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc.(Grrr..Argh)  
  
Drain Brameged Inc. Proudly Presents  
  
A Mad-Hamlet Production  
  
  
  
We walk the roads that fate lays before us. More often than we'd like that path is strewn with blades and teeth. Shadows with claws that try to gut us from within, most of us struggle foward, over, under, through all these obsticles hoping, even in the face of all evidence, that we'll be stronger for it.  
  
On occasion, through mercy, or mayhaps the whim of Gods needing entertainment, allow Fate's way to be softened. Cool breezes flow over our skin, all the living things around seem to speak to us and our existance is not only possible but worthwhile. The road is soft and comfortable and we can rest as we journy onward, wounds heal, blood stops and strength returns..just so we can face the next shadowy terror with a far too wide, sharp, grin just around the corner.  
  
On occasion we're gifted with Feather Roads. This is theirs.  
  
  
  
Feather Roads  
  
City  
  
  
  
Watching yet another idiot crash through the double doors reminds me of a poem by Joel Silvermen..or was it Silverstien? Either way I think it ended with..  
  
'Rumble, rumble, whistler roar, Tom ain't tickilish any more.'  
  
Or something like that.  
  
I think this is the third time I've heaved that sad sack out of here this week. Maybe he enjoys it?  
  
"Crash, crack, smack, boom, slam!" I mutter. "Jack is sucking on a garbage can."  
  
"What ya say Hope?" My boss asks.  
  
"Nothing." I reply. "You owe me ten bucks by the way. He was airborn for over five seconds."  
  
She doesn't say anything right to my face but I can hear her grumbling as she reaches into the cash register and hands over my cash.  
  
"Closing soon." She says. "Last call in half an hour."  
  
"Didn't you have last call twice already?" I ask though I don't really care. I just want to go home.  
  
"I mean it this time. You'll back it up if needed."  
  
I walk out from behind the bar and take my customary seat in the corner. It's closest to the door in case I need to intercept anyone, keeps the whole place in sight and above all, keeps my back to the wall. Course if any beastie decided to come in here a wall won't exactly slow them down. But I'm aware of this so that too is no biggie.  
  
One of the 'waitresses' comes to my table and puts a coke in front of me. At least she didn't give the customary 'jiggle' but I'm staff, not a customer so I'm spared a lot of the bullshit.  
  
"Weren't you kinda rough on that last guy Hope?" She asks.  
  
"He tried to paw at your sister like a dog in heat Sherry." I snap back. "I thought I was being leniant."  
  
She sits down. Great..company.  
  
"Aw, he just had too much to drink." She smiles. "He didn't mean any harm."  
  
Sure, keep on thinking that. I actually say nothing just take a sip of the coke.  
  
Out of the corner of my eye I catch movement. Damn, another moron trying to climb on the stage. I move to stand up but Sherry grabs my arm.  
  
"It's no trouble." She says. "That's just Rally."  
  
Who?  
  
I pull my arm free of Sherry's grasp and move toward the stage.  
  
"Hope!" I hear my boss call to me over the music. "Stand down."  
  
I turn on her.  
  
"Say what?" I yell back.  
  
She quickly steps from behind the bar and makes her way over to me.  
  
"That's Rally." She says in an odd echo of Sherry's words.  
  
"This is an explination how?" I say. "Rules say anyone gets on the stage I bounce em'. Now someone is.." I eye the situation. "Quite on the stage and you don't want me to bouce em'."  
  
"Shut up and watch." Is all my boss says.  
  
Normally I wouldn't but I need the money, rents due.  
  
The so named 'Rally' is an old man, I'd guess around late fifties. He's dressed like your average factory worker, maybe construction. Not bald though, good shock of grey hair. Kinda pudgy gut behind a t-shirt and faded overalls. Nice arms though, looks strong. Just the thing to hold a woman dow.. what the hell?  
  
The dancer on the stage is Susan. She's one of the rare ones. She has a chance to get out of here, actually have a life. She doesn't just get on stage and take off her clothes, she can actually dance. Black hair, white skin, lean build, really flexible. As I said, she can actually dance. I've never really talked to her, I don't really talk to nobody but the scuttlebut says she went to some presitigious school of dance somewhere, how she got here I dunno but that's not important.  
  
She makes the motions of a curtsy to Rally, okay, not a real curtsy as she's wearing exactly a thong with all the coverage of.. not a whole hell of a lot really. Rally returns the motion with a bow and she gives him her hand!  
  
Rally steps foward with arms outstreched and I move to jump up on the stage. It's my job after all. My boss's hand on my shoulder stops me. Okay, not really, I could break her grip..hell..break her without a seconds hesitation but the grip says 'wait' so I'll wait. I don't care about getting in trouble or starting a fight, I'd just rather not get thrown out of my place.  
  
Susan takes Rally's hands in her own and he pulls her close..what the hell is going on here?  
  
She disengages one of her hands and reaches into her hair, she has a rose tucked behind one ear, this she removes, Rally opens his mouth and she pops the stem of the rose between his clenched teeth.  
  
You've got to be kidding!  
  
They're going to..no way..they are! I don't belive it, it takes quite a something to surprise me. Who would dance a tango in a strip club? With Snoop Crappy Crap thundering in the backround?  
  
But that's what they're doing.  
  
Damn! They're..actcually...mm..jeeze, they're tearing the stage apart. Nobodies talking anymore, except for the the music, the click of Susan's shoes as they blaze over the stage and the heavy thud of Rally's work boots, there is no other sound. Everybody is acting like me, except for the other dancers who are all smiling like they know something and Rally's friends who are also just grinning like idiots.  
  
My fists itch.  
  
Stamp, spin, catch, bend, dance..jeeze..okay..okay..I'm impressed. You can stop now! Oh for crying out loud..right..just..end it already..no, I'll never tell you you're good..you can stop trying to impress me. Not gonna work. God..okay here we go..big finish..no? Damnit. What? Hey..that..was..I was right he is strong..just lifting her off the ground like she weighed nothing at all and.. Don't you dare drop her you big dumb.. nice catch.. Another spin and..ah..they're done.  
  
Finally.  
  
"Okay," My boss pats me on the shoulder. "Get them outta here."  
  
My fists really are itching now.  
  
"We're closing!" I hollar. "Everybody out!"  
  
There are a few grubled complaints but everyone heads for the door peaceably enough, darn.  
  
Rally steps off the stage, turns and offers his hand to Susan. She smiles and takes it before stepping off the stage herself.  
  
"You sir," She says. "Are a true gentleman."  
  
"Oh I dinno lass." A brouge? He has a scottish brouge? Oh this is priceless. "I been starin' at yer hooters the entire evenin'. Now how gentlemanly is tha?"  
  
Capn' the engines cana take it anymore!  
  
Susan just chuckles, reaches us and tousles his grey hair for a second. "See you soon?" She says.  
  
He cocks a finger like a pistol and says, "Count on it."  
  
Then with a final bow he heads for the exit.  
  
  
  
A few minutes later I'm back in my seat finishing off the coke. Sherry returns to my table, ah she discovered 'shirts' a wacky new invention but some of us like them. She's got a rag and starts to wipe off the tabletop.  
  
"Sherry." I say.  
  
"Yeah?" She says.  
  
"What was that all about?" I ask.  
  
"Rally and Susan?" She says.  
  
"No the other construction worker who was doing a tango with a topless woman." I reply.  
  
She shoots me a cross look but I don't care. "Rally's a foreman actually." She says.  
  
"And?" I coach her.  
  
"No biggie really. Rally's wife was a dancer and..." She says.  
  
"My God," I interupt rolling my eyes. "A sob story? Please..let me guess she was the victim of some tragic accident, disease, violent crime ..whatever..and he remembers her by dancing with topless women on the aniviserry of her death, their marriage, birthday or something like that."  
  
Sherry is really looking pissed now. She is no longer 'wiping' the table top but seems to be trying to scrub it.  
  
"Actually she ran off with some other guy, but not before takeing all the money they had." She says through gritted teeth. "No, Rally just likes to dance and so does Susan so sometimes we're lucky enough to see them that's all."  
  
I say nothing.  
  
Sherry finishes with the table and turns to leave, pauses. "You do know you can be a real bitch Hope don't you?" Then walks off.  
  
"Ain't that the truth." I mumble to the only company I have left, the lemon at the bottom of my glass.  
  
  
  
Aaahh..freedom. I'm standing outside the side entrance of the WBG Klub, no moon. Even if there is one seeing through this level of pollution..fat chance.  
  
I stretch. I'm exhausted, it's not the work. That's easy, compared to my old 'job' it's a damn vacation. It's being someone else. That's what wipes me out faster than anything. Who would have thought remembering to answer to a name that ain't yours would be so..tiring? Been doing it for a couple months now, think I'd be used to it. Ah well. As I said..freedom.  
  
Freedom to go back to that shit pit I call my 'home', free to sleep. Which means I'm free to not be anybody, not Hope, not Faith, not nobody. Which.. is freedom I guess.  
  
"Hope!"  
  
Aaahhh..fuck.  
  
I turn around slowly.  
  
There they are. Almost the entire staff. Susan is there, Sherry and her sister Gracie, and 'Raquel' though if that's her real name than my real name actually _is_ Hope. At least they're all dressed.  
  
Sorta.  
  
If I was a conservative politicion I'd be trying to pass a law about skirts that short. If I was a democrat... I'd be in a scandel after about a week.  
  
"I'm Hope." I say with a completly straight face. "How can I help you today?"  
  
They stop short and Sherry and Gracie exchange a quick glance. Sherry whispers something to Gracie it sounds like 'I told you she was a bitch.' but I can't be sure. Bullshit, of course I can, it's what I'd say if our roles were reveresed..or..maybe I'd just break her nose.  
  
Maybe I will break her nose.  
  
No, these are my 'co-workers', gotta watch for 'morale' and all that.  
  
"We're.." Gracie starts to say. "Uh..we're going out for a few drinks. Since you won most of our tips with all those 'Jerk Tossing' bets we were wondering if ya might wanna come along?"  
  
Oh, yes..right..let's go do that. We'll bond, become like sisters, exchange fasion tips and do each others nails. You'll take me to meet your family for Christmas dinner and I'll inexplicably fall in love with your brother whom I'll marry on a fine spring day. Fifty years from now we'll be sitting on porch somewhere, the setting sun in front of us as we watch our children's children playing in the yard.  
  
Peachy.  
  
"Sure. Sounds like fun." I say.  
  
Obviously my mouth is not paying any attention to the rules. Namely, don't connect, don't be friendly, if no one is inside than no can hurt you.  
  
Ohhh..I get it now. My brain is turning against me. I got all close and fuzzy with Willy and..no way, not a chance. Nothing gets in, nothing hurts me. Fine, I'll go have a drink but the first thing I do when I get back to my place is tear Willy's number to pieces.  
  
  
  
  
  
To quote someone ..else..'What a revoltin' development this is.'  
  
It's gotta be ..almost three in the morning and we're still at this lousy dive. All the other girls are completly blasted, I used ran out of money an hour ago and than Raquel had to get that brilliant idea of challenging men to arm wrestle me in exchange for free drinks.  
  
"But Hope.." She had cooed. "Yer so big and strong! You could handle em' no sweat."  
  
"Yeah?" I had said. I was not at my best, had few too many drinks I think. "An..an..what if I lose?"  
  
"You won't." And she just smiled.  
  
So..here I am about to arm wrestle yet another jerk for a free round.  
  
*WHAM* "I win." I smile sweetly.  
  
"You..you..go..uh.." Gracie slurs.  
  
"Hope." I provide.  
  
"Yeah!" She exclaims. "You go Hope, show those ...those..."  
  
"Men."  
  
"Men!" She breaks off into a fit of giggles. "Men that we don't need! We just gotta have Hope!"  
  
Sherry pokes her sister in the forhead. "Punning..is..punishible by death." She intones with mock severity.  
  
"I throw myself upon the mercy of the court." Gracie giggles.  
  
"What does the court say?" Sherry asks and all of a sudden I'm the center of attention.  
  
I like being the center of attention but on my own terms. These are most defiently not my own terms. All the girls are grinning at me, well..most of them are. Susan looks passed out.  
  
"Yeah." Raquel lays her hand on my shoulder. I _must_ be drunk, I'd have laid her out for that if I was sober..or wanted to at the very least. Now I just..let her hand sit there. Wierd.  
  
"Yeah." Raquel says again. Wobbling only a little she stands up on the table. "Hear ye, hear ye!" She bellows.  
  
"Gracie of the great big knockers," Oh my God. "Has been accused of 'Punning' and shall be punished forwit..forwi..right now!" She holds up one arm overhead trying to be melodramtic.  
  
"How shall she be punished oh great and mighty Judge?" She finishes and her arm comes sweeping down and she points a finger at me.  
  
Grrreeeaaaattt....now the entire BAR is staring at me. This keeps getting better and better.  
  
What to do..what to do...aha..  
  
"Three shots, hard tequila straight up." I say.  
  
Gracie is really, really, drunk. This should knock her down for the count. She'll be hating herself come the morning. I'm bad.  
  
Go Hope...  
  
Faith..I meant Go Faith.  
  
The bartender comes over with the shots and I place em' in front of Gracie who is looking none to happy right now.  
  
"There ya go babe." I purr. "Drink up!"  
  
Gracie looks at her sister who just shakes her head grinning a very evil grin. Oh..look. Susan has rejoined us.  
  
"Wha..was going on?" She mumbles.  
  
"Capital punishiment." Raquel says getting off the table.  
  
"That's nice." Susan gurgles and she's out again.  
  
Gracie is still staring at the shots in front of her. She swallows nervousley.  
  
"Drink!" Raquel commands.  
  
"Yeah!" Susan echoes, whoops, she's back. "Drink!"  
  
"Drink!" Sherry takes up the chant.  
  
I can't help myself, I'm probably wearing this big, stupid grin, drunk out of my mind, getting all friendly with people I shouldn't and..I'm going to pay for it, I just know it..but I ..I..still can't help myself.  
  
"Drink!" I say.  
  
"Drink!" I say louder.  
  
"DRINK!!" I'm shouting now.  
  
The whole place picks up on the chant.  
  
"Drink!"  
  
"Drink!"  
  
"Drink!"  
  
Someone starts pounding on their table and that catches on too.  
  
"Drink!"  
  
Pound.  
  
"Drink!"  
  
Pound.  
  
I find myself pounding along with everybody else, slapping the table top in time along with them. Heh..this is so fucking stupid.  
  
"Drink!" I scream at the top of my lungs.  
  
She drinks.  
  
Damn! She's a ballsy one. All of them one after the other! Bam, bam, bam!  
  
The bar erupts into a shouting and applause.  
  
Gracie just sits ramrod straight with this tiny smile or her face, she appears to be blushing.  
  
"Way ta go sis!" Sherry crows.  
  
"Thanks." Gracie says very, very quietly.  
  
"Way ta go sis!" Sherry shouts again, oh yeah, she's snockered. Repeating oneself is a sure sign of massive imbideness. Or gross stupidity. Either works.  
  
"Way ta go sis!" Sherry says a third time..and then pounds her sister on the back.  
  
Mistake.  
  
Gracie stands bolt upright, claps one hand over her mouth and sprints in a random direction, she doesn't know where the bathroom is so she's just zinging around the room, bouncing off tables, once she richochets off a wall, looking frantically for some door that will lead to a toilet.  
  
"Outside..OUTSIDE!!" The bartender shouts. Eyes really wide Gracie nods and darts for the entrance. The jukeboy is playing really loudly, everyone is still laughing and shouting but even through all the noise you can hear someone being very, very, sick.  
  
"Huuummmm.." Raquel leans foward. "Due to these extenuating circumstances do you think we should make her drink some more? Justice must be served after all."  
  
"Oh I dunno." Sherry replies. "I'm thinking it's being served right now."  
  
More sounds of retching follow.  
  
I think my face is going to split wide open. It's..it's bubbling around in my gut and it won't stop. It wants out but I musn't let it free. If I do I'll be open, I'll be vulnerable and these ..these...strippers will get inside and they'll hurt me, I'll get hurt again but it's just so strong and it's won't stop pushing!!  
  
I start to laugh.  
  
I start to laugh at everything. It was so funny, Sherry I mean. The chanting, the screaming, everyone laughing with us..funny, funny, funny and I'm laughing. Sherry's laughing too, Raquel is laughing so hard she's about to fall over. Her arms wrap around my shoulders to hold herself up. Hours ago I would have ripped her apart for touching me, now..now I'm just laughing harder. Susan is laughing even though she's still a little muddled.  
  
Gracie wobbles back into the entrance, has to use the doorframe to remain upright. We just keep laughing, laughing, laughing, laughing.  
  
"Hmph." Gracie snorts. "I'm..I'm..I'm jusht so..happy.. that some...people were entertained by my misfor..mis..barfing."  
  
Which just makes us laugh all the harder.  
  
I am so doomed.  
  
  
  
It's four in the morning. Three more guys now are nursing severly bruised hands and egos. We have a tray full of drinks in front of us. Yippee. I'm going to peeing all day tommorow. Oh well, that's tommorow.  
  
I slam back my vodka. Reach for another.  
  
It's quiet now. The jukebox is crooning some...crooning song..shit..whatever. Most everyone has gone home. Just us and a few stragglers at the bar. The three guys who I recently bested are playing pool.  
  
No one has said anything for a long time.  
  
"What..." Susan suddenly asks. "Whatever happened to Grey?"  
  
"Who?" I say.  
  
"Grey." Sherry supplies. "Bouncer before you. He was a really nice guy."  
  
"Yeah." Gracie echoes. She can still talk? "Tall, black hair, big muscles. Really, really nice. Never tried to peek at us in the changing rooms."  
  
"Cept on Fridays." Raquel adds. "He _always_ peeked on Fridays."  
  
"THONG NIGHT!" Sherry and Gracie shout together then start giggling again.  
  
"He had a really nice ass too." Raquel throws in.  
  
"You should know dear." Susan says. "You were fucking him after all."  
  
"I was not 'fucking' him." Raquel says holding up her fingers in the air to make the quotes motion. "I was engaged in a meaningful relationship."  
  
"With lots of sex." Gracie says with a grin.  
  
"Of course." Raquel says taking a drink. "As I said, he had a really nice ass."  
  
"So..whatever happened to im'?" Susan asks again.  
  
"Dunno." Raquel shrugs. "He just vanished one night, never heard from him again."  
  
Uh-Oh.  
  
"Then Hope comes in," Raquel continues. "And we get aaaallll the free drinks we can handle. She doesn't peek at us on Fridays either which is a plus. Miss the sex though."  
  
"Heh." I say weakly. What else is there? "Did.." I wet my lips. "Did Grey have any distinguishing features? Y'know..scars..or a tatoo?"  
  
"Well.." Susan sits up. "He had grey eyes. Grey wasn't his real name. We just called him that."  
  
Oh. Doesn't ring any bells. Don't think I dusted a vamp with grey eyes recently. Maybe he did just up and leave. Yeah..maybe...  
  
Hey. Ya just gotta have faith.  
  
Whoops! A pun! I hereby sentence myself to shree..I mean three..shots of vodka. Yippee!  
  
  
  
Ah..dark alleyway..middle of LA..can't see a thing.. surrounded by ..frie..asso..co-workers.. and we're all drunk! Could a vamps night get any better? He'd get drunk, fed and the prestiege of  
  
slayer-slaying in one easy package!  
  
No vamps though..nope, nada, zip...  
  
We're all lurching in the darkness..I've got my arms around Susan and Raquel who, subsequently are practically carrying Sherry and Gracie.  
  
Basically I'm a mule. Hee haw!  
  
I snicker.  
  
"What's so funny?" Raquel asks.  
  
"Nuthin'." I say. "Just a wierd thought."  
  
"Don't those rule?" She asks.  
  
"Dunno..try not to think so much." I say.  
  
"I hear ya..ya...ya.." She stutters. "Ya..ya know what would rule right now?"  
  
"No what?" I reply.  
  
"Some..dude coming out and trying to ..mug us y'know and you get all 'Bouncery' and beat the shit out of him."  
  
I give her a look.  
  
"You're wie.." I start to say.  
  
"Ladies!" This guy just is THERE! How the hell he do that? Wow, I am seriously out of it. No vibe though..he's human.  
  
"A pleasent evening to you." He says. "I find strapped for cash and would be wondering if you'd care to make a donation."  
  
He flicks out a knife..a KNIFE! I'm about to pee my pants laughing. Adrenilin dumps a shitload of sobriety on top of me. Play time!  
  
"Bye bye." I whisper.  
  
"What did you say lady?" The guy demands. He's walking toward us. Standard punk swagger, ah..what memories that brings back. Young..spikey hair. Leather jacket and black jeans. Fuck me, he looks like a damn extra from some action flick with Van Dummy.  
  
I snicker. I really need a bathroom.  
  
"What're you blind? What the fuck are you laughing for bitch? What the hell did you just say."  
  
I release Raquel and Susan who each are still supporting the sisters. Raquel has this big grin on her face and Susan is activly muffling herself but I can hear her giggles.  
  
"I said," And I take a step toward him. "BYE BYE!!"  
  
  
  
"Awww..you're no fun Hope." Raquel whines. "I didn't even see you move. Can we go back and beat him up again?"  
  
"No, we can't beat him up again." I sigh. "Just go home Raq. I gotta sleep this off. So do you all."  
  
We're at a well lit corner of the city streets and I'm herding the girls into a taxi. I refused to let them get in the three before this one, but this driver is female. They should be okay.  
  
"You got the address?" I ask her.  
  
"Yep." She says. Takes a drag off her cigarette that's hanging from her lip. "No worries, I'll get em' home safe. Here's my dispatcher's number if ya get worred about yer friends." And hands me a card.  
  
"They're not.." I start to say. Fuck it. "Thanks."  
  
"Night." The cabbie says.  
  
"Night." I reply.  
  
"Bye bye Hope." Susan calls out the window.  
  
"Yeah.." Raquel pokes her head out the opposite window..how can she do that with Graci and Shelly in their laps? "Bye..BYE!" and she closes the window laughing her ass off.  
  
I just shake my head and wave a bit as the taxi zooms off.  
  
Ah..freedom.  
  
I reach into my jacket pocket and pull out a old piece of paper. It's crumpled, and dirty and I know what is says by heart. Keep it though, sentimental ain't I?  
  
I can see the 'scrapers of LA being backlit by the rising sun. Tommorow's Saturday. Technically today is Saturdays but I say fuck technical.  
  
I read the words and numbers on the piece of paper.  
  
Yep, tommorow is Saturday.  
  
Gonna ring up Willy, lots to tell her.  
  
Also be nice to have someone call me by my real name for a change. Heh. 


	3. Subterfuge

Disclaimer: All this belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc. (Grrr..rarrr)  
  
  
  
Drain Brameged Inc. Proudly Presents  
  
A Mad-Hamlet Production  
  
We walk the roads that fate lays before us. More often than we'd like that path is strewn with blades and teeth. Shadows with claws that try to gut us from within, most of us struggle foward, over, under, through all these obsticles hoping, even in the face of all evidence, that we'll be stronger for it.  
  
On occasion, through mercy, or mayhaps the whim of Gods needing entertainment, allow Fate's way to be softened. Cool breezes flow over our skin, all the living things around seem to speak to us and our existance is not only possible but worthwhile. The road is soft and comfortable and we can rest as we journy onward, wounds heal, blood stops and strength returns..just so we can face the next shadowy terror with a far too wide, sharp, grin just around the corner.  
  
On occasion we're gifted with Feather Roads. This is theirs.  
  
  
  
Feather Roads  
  
Subterfuge  
  
Note: Subterfuge takes place during the 4th Season, several months after 'Forge-Blade but before the Spring Semester is over and the big beat down with Adam. Lets say..three months. Three months sound good to you? Cool. Rock on!  
  
  
  
"...too repeat, even though a conversation may appear simple to the casual observer it remains, in fact, a highly complex activity. Not only are there the roles of 'Speaker' and 'Listener' but there are also responsibilities that each role imparts on those involved in the coversation. It is the Speaker's responsibility to insure that the Listener, his or her counterpart in the Conversational Process is able to understand clearly and easily everything that is being said..."  
  
Inhale..inhale..you have to inhale sooner or later you stupid proffessor of..of..what is this course again? But does he breathe? Noo..just talk, talk, talk, blather tweet whoodle, never stopping, never ending..what is he..some sort of hellish new amalgamation between Human Administration and Hellmout energies? The Eternal Teacher?  
  
Doesn't he breathe? Well?  
  
Inhale damn you!! Stop! Pause! Desist is the gum flapping! Just for a second..please..just one, sweet, sweet second without your damn droning filling the room. Oh Please..Oh Please..Oh please..  
  
"So students, to sum up..."  
  
YES!!!  
  
"You must be aware of the actual complexities of a basic conversation, which go beyond simple speech. If you'll just cast your eyes to the front of the room I have a series of slides which should illustrate my point nicely."  
  
NO!!!  
  
OhGodnopleasenotthisanythingbutSLIDES!!!  
  
I look about the lecture hall despretely. Someone here must be able to help me, aid me in conquering this threat..this..evil..this...monstrosity(Oo big word!)..this..this....LECTURE!!  
  
Most of the seats empty, maybe the students sitting there were smarter than I was and ran from the room at top speed. Maybe I could...no. I need the credit hours.  
  
Wah!  
  
Oh..wait! There she is, my hope, my saviour! She's sitting right next to me, how could I be so blind as to forget her, she'll make everything all better, she'll protect me from the threat of..Education. She'll...she'll...she's taking notes?  
  
Damn these dark forces for corupting her so! I will free you my Willow!  
  
I open my notebook and select a cool, clean, piece of paper. This I slowly, and quietly tear out, blah..I hate those little pieces of paper that get stuck in the metal loops. Grrr... Ahh..there we go.  
  
What to do ..what to do... I casually peek out of the corner of my eyes at Willow. She's still bent over her notebook, carefully and laboriously taking very, precise notes. Aha! Got it.  
  
I write my thoughts quickly and slide the paper over so it bumps into her elbow. It takes a few seconds for her to notice it. She glances up, see's the paper and reads the note.  
  
'Nice Sweater.'  
  
And indeed it is a very nice sweater. I've been working very hard to get my Willow to wear clothing that is a just a tad more risque. The aformentioned sweater is an excellent example of compromise. Warm, fuzzy and just the nicest shade of light blue, with a line of slightly darker blue buttons running up the front. It's also very, very tight. When I first got it for her and she tried it on she swore it was trying to strangle her, but these days it's her favorite.  
  
Willow writes down her response and slides the paper back to me.  
  
'Thanks.'  
  
  
  
I feel a tingle of mischivious energies ripple along my spine. This'll beat those classroom doledrums for sure!  
  
I scribble out another message on the same piece of paper and I slide it back to Willow.  
  
Willow casually glances at the new words on the paper.. and her face goes bright red! She shoots me a look of exasperation and then quickly hugs the paper to her chest while making sure no one around us happened to read it over her shoulder, eyes darting around the room. After a few minutes, interupted by repeated furitive glances around, she puts the paper back on the desk, carefully smooths out the wrinkles as best she can and picks up her pen.  
  
  
  
The paper slowly slides across the desk back to me and I think I Willow's hand is trembling just an eensy, teensy bit.  
  
I glance at the words she wrote.  
  
'With your teeth?? Can you do that?'  
  
I look up from the paper and see Willow staring at me wil a small smile creeping about her lips. I answer her question by clicking my teeth together a few times in her direction. She covers her mouth with both hands to muffle the giggle. Her cheeks are burning bright red again too. She's such a cutie.  
  
Willow reaches out, grabs the piece of paper and writes out another note before sliding it back.  
  
'Where do you want to have lunch?'  
  
Ah, a serious question. Trying to change the subject are we? Naughty, naughty! Can't have you spoiling my fun now Wiccan-mine. Need to think..what would ..ah. Got it.  
  
I quickly write, 'It's not a question of where, but a question of what.' and I slide the paper back to her.  
  
This time she has to stifle the surprised yelp that almost bursts from her throat and she does sit bolt upright in her seat. Eyes spinning wildly she looks around afraid that anyone will have noticed her outburst. But no, the spell of the Evil Proffessor of Doom is a powerful one and everyone else seems to have lapsed into some sort of vegetative state. Thank God for innduendo! It probably saved my soul.  
  
Willow's staring at me again with a fake 'I'm cranky' look on her face. Lower lip sticking out just a little bit, a little crease which is scrunching her eyebrows together but I can tell she's just playing from the tiny crinkles around her eyes. She lets out a barely audible 'hmph' and crosses her arms in a deliberate gesture. She does it again a few more times to make sure I get the point. 'Hmph!'  
  
I smile, time to throw some fuel on the fire!!  
  
I poke her gently on the shoulder.  
  
"Hmph!" She hmphs again.  
  
I poke.  
  
A more forceful Hmph is my reward.  
  
Poke.  
  
"Hmph Hmph!!" Crosses the arms.  
  
Poke, poke.  
  
She gives a resigned sigh and faces me.  
  
Smiliing wickedly, I point at her then back at me while slowwwllly licking my lips. Then, with exaggerated movements I rub my tummy.  
  
Willow's jaw is just hanging open. Her eyes are very, very big as well...every few seconds a tiny squeak manages to escape her throat. I hold up a finger over my lips and pantomine going 'ssshhhh'.  
  
"eek." She says.  
  
More fuel.  
  
Glance around quick, good, no one's paying attention.  
  
I slowly, slowly...bring my fingers up and kiss the tips one..by..one then reach out and touch her cheek quickly but softly.  
  
"eek!" She says again.  
  
Now she's really red.  
  
I smile and wink at her.  
  
Her hand dives for the pen, there's a moment of furious scribbling and the paper, now fairly drowning in notes has new words for me to read.  
  
'You're a meanie!!' With the word meanie underlined three times.  
  
I nonchalantly pick up my own pen and write back:  
  
'Where do you want to have lunch?'  
  
I smile sweetly, takes a few seconds but I resist the urge to bat my eyelashes. I settle for trying to look all sweet and innocent.  
  
"Eek!"  
  
Now I have to try not to laugh out loud. This is fun.  
  
She scribbles another note.  
  
'You are such a meanie!' This time both 'such' and 'meanie' have been underlined more than once.  
  
I write back. 'Sorry. How can I make it up to you.' She's putty in my hands.  
  
Aww..I don't get an eek this time.  
  
Uh...oh...uh oh..I know that look.. Willow cannot look sultry on purpose if she tries but when she doesn't want too she does, really, really well. And right now that accidental 'Sultry' look is burning across the space between us to nail me right between the eyes.  
  
The paper slides across the desk toward me and now the sound of paper grinding across plastic coated wood is very, very loud. I'm sure someone had to have heard that but a quick glance around the room confirms that no one is paying attention to anything, including the proffessor.  
  
"...must reiterate that body language is another primary factor in communication that is woefully underappreciated and that it, not verbal communication, can be used to convey meanings and messages that would be impossible with just the limitations of the spoken word..."  
  
I tune the proffessor out and look at Willow. Flushed cheeks, eyes very, very bright, small smile dancing on her lips. Yay body language!  
  
I look at the newest words on the paper.  
  
'I'm sure I can think of something.'  
  
I raise an eyebrow. This is rather daring of her...let's see how far she wants to play.  
  
I write back, 'Like?'  
  
I slide the paper over to her. She reads. She looks at me. She smiles. I'm in trouble.  
  
She pretends to think about it for a minute. Tapping the tip of her pen against her lower lip eyes looking everywhere but at me. She hmmm's quietly a few times, every once in a while shaking her head as if dismissing a thought. Finally pen dips to paper and her hand moves the latest note across the desk to me.  
  
'Buy me a mocha!'  
  
What? What?? Ooooh.. is she ever going to get it!!  
  
'Now you're being the meanie!' I write back.  
  
She reads it and almost giggles aloud again.  
  
The paper slides over to me again and I read...  
  
'Well, you could do more than just buy me a mocha.'  
  
I smile, this is more like it, I write again. 'Like?' and slide the paper back.  
  
Her pen moves across the paper and she slides it back to me. Slide, write, slide, write..this _is_ fun. Reminds me of high school. Course if the proffesor catches us and I have to read it I'll eat the paper first! I read her words.  
  
'You could buy me two mochas!'  
  
I shoot a glare at Willow but she's not paying attention to me. Indeed she's again looking like the perfect student. Eyes fixed on the teacher, pen dancing across her notebook as she takes notes. It's only the doodles she's actaully drawing and the green eyes peeking at me from underneath red hair, and the small smile still being worn, that tell me otherwise.  
  
Then the bell rings.  
  
"...chapters two and three to prepare for the next lesson. I'll see you all Thursday." The teacher concludes.  
  
"Willow!" I say loudly lurching to my feet. "You are such the Ex- Wiccan!!"  
  
Lauging Willow grabs her books and stuffs them in her bag. "You'll have to catch me first Slayer!" Then she sticks her tounge out at me, and runs for the exit. I'm still standing behind my desk in a mild state of shock. She reaches the door, turns, winks and, making sure again no one is too nearby, and pats her ass in my direction then she bolts out the door.  
  
I love body language.  
  
I take off after her. 


	4. Talking the Talk

Disclaimer: All this belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc. (Grrr..rarrr)  
  
  
  
Drain Brameged Inc. Proudly Presents  
  
A Mad-Hamlet Production  
  
We walk the roads that fate lays before us. More often than we'd like that path is strewn with blades and teeth. Shadows with claws that try to gut us from within, most of us struggle foward, over, under, through all these obsticles hoping, even in the face of all evidence, that we'll be stronger for it.  
  
On occasion, through mercy, or mayhaps the whim of Gods needing entertainment, allow Fate's way to be softened. Cool breezes flow over our skin, all the living things around seem to speak to us and our existance is not only possible but worthwhile. The road is soft and comfortable and we can rest as we journy onward, wounds heal, blood stops and strength returns..just so we can face the next shadowy terror with a far too wide, sharp, grin just around the corner.  
  
On occasion we're gifted with Feather Roads. This is theirs.  
  
  
  
Feather Roads  
  
Talking the Talk  
  
  
  
"Give me the remote." I say.  
  
"No." Buffy smiles holding it away from me. With her other hand she dips into the bowl of chips and munches a handful.  
  
"Give me the remote!" I say again, I try and use my 'resolve' face to add power to the command but her smile, and slow wink makes me giggle instead. This is just no fair.  
  
"Please Buffy, give me the remote." Puppy dog eyes, that'll do the trick.  
  
"No go babe. I got the Anti-Puppy factor going for me." She smirks.  
  
"That being what?" I say with a pout.  
  
"I have your feet." She says and her grip slams around my ankles.  
  
"Oohh no no no no no no no no!" I beg..in vain. I know where this is going and I love every second of it.  
  
Nonchalantly she puts the remote down, still safely out of reach.  
  
"Why what do we have here?" She says with a fake look of surprise. "Helpless and defenseless Willow feet!"  
  
  
  
"No no no no no no no please Buffy..no no no no.." I'm still begging. She's too good at this.  
  
"We all know what happens to unprotected Willow Feet don't we?" She asks with a lecherous grin.  
  
"No no no no please no no no oh Goddess save your..." I'm interupted by Buffy's truimphant shout of "TICKLE MONSTER!"  
  
And I can't say anything for the next few minutes.  
  
  
  
It takes me about ten minutes to regain my composure..er..catch my breath..  
  
"Please can I have the remote?" I ask quietly.  
  
"Sorry lover." Buffy quips. She's sat back on her end of the sofa, eating another handful of chips, "But it's my house, so my rules..I grew up watching this show and I want to re-live some of the good old days. So there." And she sticks her tounge out at me.  
  
"But..but..but.." I stammer. "Betwiched? I mean..that show is so..insulting to witches and..and..that nose thing? I mean..who believes that..and all this matter just popping in and out. And Samantha's mother, what self-respecting whitch in her right mind would dress like that? I absolutly adore you Buffy and knowning tonight we'll be making mad passionate love does make me feel all warm and tingly but if you actaully try and make me watch this whole 'Bewitched' marathon I'm gonna-"  
  
"Uh..Hi! Mom!" Buffy says loudly.  
  
"Wish the Earth will swallow me up right this very second." I squeak.  
  
Please be kidding, please be kidding, please be kidding, please be kidding...I look at Buffy. Back ramrod straight, eyes big and wide, mouth kind of slack..oh..this is so not good.  
  
Turn the head..slowly..slowly..don't want to be all panicky if she's faking, she'll think she got me, I'm not going to let her get me, and..and..if..she..oh big time trouble no..if she isn't faking I have too..have too..look..oh..oh oh oh...no.  
  
"H-hi..Mrs...ah..Summers." I stammer out.  
  
Then fall out of the sofa.  
  
  
  
"Willow?" I hear.  
  
"Willow? Can you hear me?" Don't think I recognise the voice. Mmm..sleepy.  
  
"Mom, give me some room." Hi Buffy..what are you doing in my dream?  
  
"Buffy, what was that Willow was saying..making..."  
  
"Not now Mom, later. I promise..just let me get Willow on the sofa."  
  
"Here, put this blanket on top of her. I'll get some water." Ah..now I recognise that voice..that's Buffy's mom, Joyce. She's nice though she did have rather bad timing coming back home unexpectedly just when I was telling Buffy about how..  
  
I sit bolt upright.  
  
"IwasjustkiddingMrsSummersIswearwhateveryouheardwaswrong!" I blurt out.  
  
"Shhh..." Buffy's on her knees beside me. Stroking my hair..it's nice... I can feel my heart hammering really loudly, but still her hand feels nice. I lean into the touch.  
  
"Oh..oh that was scary." I say to Buffy, closing my eyes. "I dreamed your mother came home and..."  
  
"Here's the water and..oh..Willow. You're awake. Are you alright dear?"  
  
Eep.  
  
  
  
"YesImquiteallrightMrsSummersthanksforaskingBuffyitsbeenfunbutIreallyreallyr eallythinkIhavetogonow!"  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
"No, you better stay here Willow." Mrs. Summers says sitting next to me. "You did just suffer a fainting spell after all."  
  
Her smile is warm and friendly but her eyes are really serious. What I can see of them, I'm not exactly looking her in the face as my chin is trying to merge with my breastbone.  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
Panic!  
  
"Buffy..what was that Willow was saying as I came in the room?" Mrs Summers asks. I can't really tell how she's looking. My fingers are very, very intresting right now.  
  
I hear Buffy sigh. I know that sigh it's the, 'Okay here we go this should be a real bucket of laughs.' sigh.  
  
"Yes mom, Willow and I are lovers, yes mom I'm sure, no mom I havn't tried not being in love with her, yes mom I'm going to stick with her, yes mom we should have told you, yes mom I'm sorry but we were scared. I'm sorry." Buffy says in one breath.  
  
I try real hard not to giggle.  
  
"Oh." Mrs. Summers says. I glance at her. She's still sitting next to me, looks relaxed enough, she's not looking at either me, or Buffy, just..off into space.  
  
"Mom?" Buffy asks.  
  
Mrs. Summers doesn't say anything.  
  
"Mom?" Buffy asks again.  
  
Still nothing.  
  
"Did..did..we break her?" I ask quietly.  
  
"I..don't think so." Buffy leans foward. "Mom, this is the part where you smile and say 'Whatever makes you happy dear.' right? You're not going to go homophobe on us are you?" Buffy waves her hand in her mother's face a few times.  
  
Mrs. Summers snaps back. "Are you really sure Buffy? Lord knows I experimented in College when.."  
  
I give a loud yelp and pull the blankets over my head, stick my fingers in my ears and loudly beging to hum 'These Boots are Made For Walking' as loudly as I can. Doesn't work.  
  
"Mom!" Buffy interupts her. "If you never, ever finish that sentence I swear I'll not bring up the band candy incident ever again!"  
  
"I was going to say with dope Buffy." I peek my head out from under the blanket.  
  
"You tried marijina Mrs. Summers?" I ask hesitantly.  
  
She smiles at me. She still looks a little serious but nowhere near 'crush little jewish girl who you just discovered has been having sex with your only daughter' class homicidal.  
  
  
  
It's the quiet ones, I remind myself..gotta watch out for the quiet ones.  
  
"Once Willow." That was enough. She looks at the two of us with that 'mom' look that somehow they learn from..somebody.  
  
"I take it..." She says slowly. "This was not a one time thing."  
  
"About a year mom." Buffy easily replies. How can she be so relaxed? If my parents find out they'll have me excommunicated! No..wait..we're Jewish we don't do that..well..it'll be bad.  
  
"And...you love Willow, is that correct?" Joyce asks her daughter.  
  
"Do you..." Buffy replies. She seems to be thinking. "Do you remember what I told you about Angelus mom? About two years ago?"  
  
Slowly Mrs Summers nods. Where is Buffy going with this?  
  
"Let me put it like this then." Buffy says. "If I had had to do to Willow, what I had to do to Angel, I would not have gotten on the bus leaving Sunnydale.  
  
What?  
  
"Buffy, I'm afraid I don't.." Mrs. Summers begins.  
  
"I would have let it run over me." Buffy finishes.  
  
Aww..what a sweet thing to say..oh..wait..no it isn't..well..maybe I mean..but..suicide..that's bad..but feeling so strongly so..that's good and..uh...mmm..  
  
"Ah." Mrs. Summers says. She's using that tone of voice that parents use when they want to appear 'wise'. "I see." She pauses, eyebrows creasing. "I think."  
  
"I love Willow mom." Buffy says very matter-of-factly, taking my hand. "Nuff said."  
  
"And..you..Willow..you love Buffy?" She turns to me.  
  
Ohmygoshshe'slookingrightatmeandI'mgonnadie!!Helphelphelpehelphelp!  
  
"Yeah!" I say loudly. I'm sure I'm waring some manical grin. "She's..she's..Buffy's..ah..sweet..really sweet..and no..that didn't come out right I mean she's very, very, nice and I love her a lot can I go to the bathroom please?"  
  
"Do you have too?" Mrs. Summers asks very quietly, using that Wise voice again.  
  
"NotreallybutIthinkI'mgoingtocombustI'msoembarrssed!" I squeak.  
  
Mrs Joyce pats me on the head. Hey! I'm no kid I'm in college, I'm an adult, I'm mature, I'm..I'm..not hyperventilating anymore. Neat!  
  
"Nothing to be that embarrssed over Willow." Mrs. Summers says quietly. "Okay, so it was kind of alkward. Myself walking in at just the wrong time..." She pauses. "Or the right time maybe."  
  
She turns to her daughter. "When exatly were you going to share this with me?"  
  
Buffy turns bright red and flaps her hands around helplessly. She shoots me a pained look, a plea for help but I'm barely hanging on as is.  
  
"Uh..that is..the..er..right time?" She says helplessly.  
  
Mrs. Summers sighs. "Well..I suppose now will do. I didn't discover about Angel for nearly two years so I should be used to it by now."  
  
"Well..that and Parker." I chip in..oh god no I said exactly the wrong thing. Buffy levels a 'I will kill you later' glare my way. "Uh..did I say Parker? I meant..umm..barker..yeah..don't see too many good carnival barkers these days, what with there being no Carnivals to bark for I mean..wow..television really killed them huh. Intresting that.  
  
Mrs. Summers doen't buy it.  
  
"Parker?" She looks at her daughter with a raised eyebrow crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
"College experiment mom. Failed..big time. Savor the irony." Buffy says in reply, also crossing her arms. Like mother, like daughter.  
  
"Another time then." Mrs. Summers says. She looks betweent the two of us again.  
  
"Just exactly how did this start?" She asks.  
  
NO! Don't wanna remember, won't remember..just..push it back..breathe..breathe..shh shh...  
  
I feel Buffy wrapping her arms around me, take strength from Buffy, Buffy's here..shhh..shhh..you're alright..you're alright....  
  
"Not a good question mom. Let is drop okay?"I hear Buffy saying. She sounds a little far away.  
  
In one two three  
  
Out one two three  
  
In one twho three  
  
Out one two three  
  
Breathe..relax..breathe..relax..okay..I'm okay..  
  
I open my eyes and look at Mrs. Summers. She's wearing a look of real concern, she's shifted foward a little and looking me in the eyes ernestly.  
  
"Are...are you sure honey?" She asks.  
  
"I'm sure." Buffy says.  
  
"Surley sure." I echo.  
  
"Hey." Buffy kisses the top of my head. "Welcome back."  
  
"Did I leave?" I ask.  
  
"Zoned for a second, but ya toughed it out." She replies back to me, I can hear her smile. I can also hear her heart too. It's hammering like mine, so..she's not the only nervous one. Still..it could have been the 'question' not getting caught.  
  
I inhale deeply..ah..Buffyscent. Much, much better.  
  
"So..let me get this straight." Mrs. Summers says. "You two are engaged in a lesbian relationship, have been for nearly a year, are deeply in love and you can't tell me how it all started?"  
  
"Uh..yeah?" I answer her quietly.  
  
"That about sums it up mom." Buffy says.  
  
"So much for grandchildren." Mrs. Summers sighs.  
  
"MOM!" Buffy says loudly.  
  
"Sorry dear." Mrs. Summers says.  
  
I, personally, find the entire exchange quite funny.  
  
"Well..ah..mm..you never know..Mrs. Summers. Her first love was a vampire, mine was a werewolf, we've beaten vampires, demons, nearly been sacrificed, involved with a goverment conspiracies, and fought things that would make a terminator seem like a teddy ruxpin." I shrug. "What's the big deal of two women having children?"  
  
Mrs. Summers gives me a pained smile. "Well..I suppose so Willow."  
  
"You can stop helping me at any time you know" Buffy says.  
  
I tilt my head and kiss the tip of her chin. "But I like helping." I say with an arched eyebrow.  
  
Buffy just groans and buries her face in my hair. Tingly!  
  
"Oh, Betwiched is on." Mrs. Summers says. "Remember when we used to watch that together Buffy?"  
  
"Sure thing mom!" Buffy says letting me go and squeesing into the space between me and  
  
Mrs. Summers. "How about we catch up on times huh?"  
  
"Sounds like fun." Mrs. Summers says and makes herself more comforatable on the sofa.  
  
Buffy turns her face to mine and mouths the words 'Neener, neener.'  
  
I stick my tounge out at her but accept my fate.  
  
We watch the television for a few minutes.  
  
"Your boyfriend was a werewolf?"  
  
  
  
  
  
Authors notes: A little short, a little rushed..but a friend was in desperate need of a WAFFY fic after reading Sundowning. I _live_ for those moments. 


	5. Risqué

Disclaimer: All this belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc. (Grrr..rarrr)  
  
  
  
Drain Brameged Inc. Proudly Presents  
  
A Mad-Hamlet Production  
  
We walk the roads that fate lays before us. More often than we'd like that path is strewn with blades and teeth. Shadows with claws that try to gut us from within, most of us struggle foward, over, under, through all these obsticles hoping, even in the face of all evidence, that we'll be stronger for it.  
  
On occasion, through mercy, or mayhaps the whim of Gods needing entertainment, allow Fate's way to be softened. Cool breezes flow over our skin, all the living things around seem to speak to us and our existance is not only possible but worthwhile. The road is soft and comfortable and we can rest as we journy onward, wounds heal, blood stops and strength returns..just so we can face the next shadowy terror with a far too wide, sharp, grin just around the corner.  
  
On occasion we're gifted with Feather Roads. This is theirs.  
  
  
  
Feather Roads  
  
Risqué  
  
  
  
"Mmmmmm..." Willow purrs and snuggles deeper in my embrace. One of her feet idly kicks off the end of the covers exposing our feet to the cool night air.  
  
"Hhhhmmm..." She continues to purr.  
  
"I hear the sounds of a content kitty cat!" I say quietly, easing my fingers tips under her chin and coaxing her head to tilt upward. Reluctantly, almost, she opens her eyes slowly.  
  
"Meeyyooww!" She whispers and nips the tip of my ear with her lips.  
  
I turn my head a bit and kiss her back, she deepens the kiss a bit and slips her tounge between my teeth. I taste cinnimon, and sunshine and..heh..a bit of myself. Whoops! Bad Slayer.  
  
She moans a tiny bit into the kiss as I caress her spine with the tips of my fingers. Her back arches away from my touch and her skin gets all goospimply.  
  
She pulls away a bit and the kiss ends, that's fine though, there are a billion, billion more where that came from. Our foreheads meet and we remain that way for a while, just breathing, being, y'know..loving type stuff.  
  
"Sleepy." Willow whispers after a bit.  
  
"Are you sleepy my Willow?" I whisper back. She nods.  
  
"Aw. Poor Willow is sleepy." I pull her down so she's using my shoulder as a pillow, I hear her give a contented sigh and snuggle up even closer. She throws one leg over mine trapping them between her. She sighs again.  
  
"This is nice." She murmers, eyes closed once more.  
  
"Is this nice my Willow." I humm and kiss the top of her head. "Is this nice for my.."  
  
Dare I?  
  
Heck yeah!  
  
"Pussywillow?"  
  
Here eyes snap open and she gives an outraged squeal. "Buffy!"  
  
"What?" I ask her innocently. I open my eyes real wide to complete the look. Can't laugh now, gotta keep a straight face or I'm toast. "I'm talking about those little grey fuzzy things, y'know kind of oblong, really, really soft? What, lover mine, were you thinking?"  
  
She blushes a bit and looks away. "Nothin'" She admits.  
  
"Oh." I say. I relent a little with the teasing. I try and veer the topic a bit from innduendoes to ..  
  
"I wish I did have a pussywillow." I mumble. "Something soft for this very soft skin." And I trace small white lines along the flesh of her back.  
  
"But you do have a pussywillow." She whispers back to me, lifting her eyes again to meet my own. "She's right here!" And leans foward to catch my lips once more as it's my turn to be shocked speechless. It takes me a few seconds to react to the kiss but I'm soon giving as good as I'm getting, and it's so..so..very, very good.  
  
Finally I break off the kiss. "Willow!" I gasp. "You're such an evil little witch!"  
  
"You betcha!" She chirrups with a nod to emphasise her total agreement.  
  
She puts her head back down on my shoulder, closes her eyes and, I'm guessing, drifts off to sleep.  
  
This is one of many, many, reasons I love her so, and like her. You can love someone and not like them, believe me, I know. You can even love them and still hate them with all the ...well..hate them a heck of a lot. But I like her, and love her. One reason is she can be ..just such a surprise. One minute timid, the next wanton then back to timid. Best of all she isn't even aware she's doing it. It's just her, part and parcel, an aspect of the whole redheaded, hewbrew, wiccan chunk of goodness I have in my arms.  
  
Like? Definetly.  
  
Love? Eternally.  
  
  
  
So here we are. In my bedroom. The window beside us is open to let in the fresh air, an occasional cloud moves across the sky, I can tell, as the moonlight shining through fades in and out every once in a while. We're both lying on one half of my big ol' bed. We got so used to sharing such a tiny bed back at the dorms that I guess it's a hard habit to break. We either stick to one side of my queenie or the other. Always together, always in contact. Going all the way to hold each other the whole night long, or, at the very least a hand resting on a thigh, or someone's back. We're always touching in one way or the other.  
  
I look around the room. Mr. Gordo my guard piggy is in his place, the alarm clock properlly functioning for the summer. Meaning that it's unplugged and tossed in the corner. Bad, evil alarm clock! For the next few weeks you are dead! Whooha! Clothes are scattered around the room. Well..mine are. Willow always insists on folding hers and putting them in a small neat pile. I think she does it to annoy me, all it really does is make me...uhmm..hungry. Cause, she takes em' off one at a time. First the shirt, folds it, dress, pants, whatever, fold that, pick up the shirt, lay the pants, skirt..again whatever, down, put the shirt on top, reach behind and really arch the back to unclasp her bra...fold that and..bend OVER to put it on top of her shirt.  
  
She's a natural striptease.  
  
Usually by that point I'm having a very diffilcult time remembering to breathe.  
  
But that was a while ago. Now we're just resting, or..she is. I'm thirsty. I move very, very, slowly, reaching over her sleeping form, I think she's asleep, to my bedstand for the glass of water I know is there. Carefully, carefully, while it would be fun to hear her scream if I dropped some water on her, the resulting suspension of smoochie n' snuggles priviledges would be not so much fun.  
  
  
  
I tilt the glass and beging to drink.  
  
"Y'know why I like being naked with you Buffy?"  
  
It is only through Slayer training I do not spit the contents of my mouth clear across the room. Really. Slayer training, natch.  
  
I swallow..choke... gasp.. and finally can speak.  
  
"Say..say that bit again?" I ask Willow.  
  
She's kind enough not to laugh at me.  
  
"Do you know what I like about being naked with you?" She says again. She's got this impish smile, like ..I dunno. Just..wide eyes, broad grin with ..it's just lovely. Trust me on this okay?  
  
"You mean," I cough. "You mean from beside the obvious?"  
  
"Oh the obvious is groovy." She says nochalantly. "Beyond groovy in fact. It's groovin' past groovy, well on it's way to stupendous, rightious, with just a smidgen of heavenly."  
  
"A smidgen?" I question with a raised eyebrow.  
  
"Okay, just a teensieset bit more than a smidgen." And she holds her thumb and finger apart a few centimeters.  
  
I shake my head, set the glass aside and grab her, spinning her over so I'm on top looking down on her.  
  
"Okay then." I say. Our noses even less far apart than her fingers were a second ago ago. "Tell me why you like being naked with me." I can smell her breathe, it's hot n'sweet..and..ready.  
  
A few beads of sweat just appeared on her upper lip. I've very tempted to lick them off.  
  
"It's..because..." She gasps out, she then hmmm in ..pleasure I hope! Probably because I'm running my finger tips along her sides with my left hand while the fingers of my right slowly slide along the edge of her ear.  
  
"Yes?" I hiss.  
  
"We're the same height now."  
  
Ohh..kay..that was unexepected. I don't stop what I'm doing, Nothing could stop me now, but it does kind of ...distract me a bit. What did I tell ya, she's a bundle of surprises.  
  
"Come again?" I ask helpfully.  
  
Her eyes are closes and she whimpers a bit when I give a lazy pinch to her ear.  
  
"You're the Slayer." She whispers. "So tall and strong, and powerful and beautiful. Larger than life. Hmmm....tease."  
  
I've snaked my left hand down, paste her waise and am slowly tracing circles with two fingers on the back of her thigh. She lifts her knee a few inches to...help.  
  
"And?" I ask still stroking her skin, I lean down to her untouched ear and take the tip between my teeth, squeezing just the littlest bit, then, after letting it go, blow cool air across the flesh, over her ear, along the back of her neck. I love watching the hair stand up. She just gives a little gasp and shifts, raising her right leg and crossing it over me, using it, and her arms, to pull me against her.  
  
"Now..though." She still has her eyes closed. "Now your Buffy. My Buffy. Forever n'ever my Buffy. We're the same height now."  
  
And I understand what she's talking about. Perfectly. Clarity. And I have another fantastic reason to lover her, and like her, and cherish her and... I just love surprises.  
  
"Yeah.." I whisper into her ear. "Yeah we are."  
  
It's my turn to purr and arch my back, as her own nails start moving in lazy and exotic patterns over my back musles. One finger pauses to trace the outline of a few small scars, she knows where they all are by heart and, despite being made from pain, now she uses them for pleasure. Mine.  
  
"You know what." She begins to say. I pay half attention. Most of my mind is singing with sensation. I'm all goosepimply now...goosepimply and hot and ..and...content yet hungry and..mmm..lots of 'MMMmmm-factor' pouring through me.  
  
"Wh..what?" I manage to get out. Damn she's good. I rest my forehead against her, all the strength is just pooling away from me, I feel all noodley too.  
  
"There's another reason I like being naked with you." She says between kisses to my face, my eyes, ears...fingers are still moving, hers I mean. I've..sorta fallen behind.  
  
"Why's that?" I say. More sigh really. I'm the kitty cat now. Purrrr...  
  
"Can't tell you." Willow says, her fingers have moved down my back, and now it's my turn to be teased by the edges of nails along the back of my thighs and upward and down.  
  
"Uh..uh...mm..why?" I say.  
  
"Have to show you!" And my eyes shoot open as her hands suddenly clasp my face, she lifts her face to meet my own and I the subsequent is...just so tempting!  
  
With a burst of strength Willow flips me over back onto ..uh..my back without breaking the kiss. Hands, tounge...hunger. Everything.  
  
"Yessss.." I moan into her mouth. "Show me!"  
  
God I love how she surprises me. 


	6. Revelry

Disclaimer: All this belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc. (Grrr..rarrr)  
  
  
  
Drain Brameged Inc. Proudly Presents  
  
A Mad-Hamlet Production  
  
We walk the roads that fate lays before us. More often than we'd like that path is strewn with blades and teeth. Shadows with claws that try to gut us from within, most of us struggle foward, over, under, through all these obsticles hoping, even in the face of all evidence, that we'll be stronger for it.  
  
On occasion, through mercy, or mayhaps the whim of Gods needing entertainment, allow Fate's way to be softened. Cool breezes flow over our skin, all the living things around seem to speak to us and our existance is not only possible but worthwhile. The road is soft and comfortable and we can rest as we journy onward, wounds heal, blood stops and strength returns..just so we can face the next shadowy terror with a far too wide, sharp, grin just around the corner.  
  
On occasion we're gifted with Feather Roads. This is theirs.  
  
  
  
Feather Roads  
  
Revelry  
  
  
  
"Ok mate." I toss the butt of the cigarette in the corner and bend over the table. "Off the bumper, eight ball in the side pocket."  
  
My..donation victim shakes his head. "You make that shot and I'll double up."  
  
I glance at him. "That a fact?" I say slowly.  
  
"Sure." He snickers. "What, ya don't trust me?"  
  
'Not a bloody chance.' I want to say. 'Your dressed like a reject from those the Hell's Angles rejected. No..wait. Like those who the Hell's Angels nearly beat to death, then rejected.'  
  
Course not being able to actually hurt the stupid sod should things get ugly, I don't.  
  
"Course I do." I smile. "We're all so gentlemanly arn't we?"  
  
He mutters a curse. "Take the damn shot."  
  
"Happy too." I reply. Course the ball goes zactly where said it would. You don't play this game as long as I have without learning a few things. S'why I chose this dive, not for the decor or the watered down beer. But it's the only place I've found where there's zero chance the Scoobs will come and also has a perfectly flat table. Yeah, that's right, we're at the same place where we met Red's little pals.  
  
The Eight ball sinks into the pocket with a quiet thunk.  
  
"Right then sport." I stand up and lay my cue on the table. "What with the double up I'm thinking..mm.." Do a little mental arithmatic. "Cool three hundred to go."  
  
"Three hundred huh?" He's glowering at me. Got his teeth clenched, his knuckles have gone white around his own cue stick. Two of his pals walk up behind him and one pats him on the shoulder. I know they're his pals cause they're wearing the same 'colors'.  
  
'Colors.' on white people. What happened to the good ol' days where they had similar tatoos or moterbikes. Tsk, no respect for tradition.  
  
My former opposition relaxes and smiles a slow, lazy smile. "It seems, me and my buds don't have the money to pay you your winnings. Isn't that too bad."  
  
I glance behind where he's standing. There are two other guys sitting at the booth behind them, similary decked out. Total of five. I really hate this soddin' chip.  
  
"Yeah." I say slowly. "That is too bad."  
  
I grab my duster and slip it over my shoulders and just walk away. Course inside I'm screaming, the demon just rattlin' to be let free. I could let it go, but all that would do is get a quick scare, most likely resulting in a quick retreat. I don't want them to run. I want my soddin' money!  
  
I sit by the bar and order a pitcher. The bartender raises his eyebrows but I ignore him. He puts it down, and a glass and I pour myself a cold one. Not really hungry. Bored. Angry and bored. Less than a year ago that would have resulted in good times, now more often than not, it's just me bein' angry and bored.  
  
Some others come step through the door. They look a lot like my former 'buddies'. That is, stupid looking ..only they're wearing a diffrent colored bandanda. Why bandanas? It doesn't make you look macho mate, it makes you look like the Villiage People. Oh great, now I've got that fucking song stuck in my head.  
  
I watch the two groups eye each other carefuly. I know this kind of thing. Pack mentality. 'Cept right now I'm thinkin' we're talking about the potential destructive power of a tank, commanded by the brain power of a labrador retriever. The whole place has gone a little quiet, like some sort of awed respect. Respect..right. I'd expect these guys to make good eatin', not respect them, any o'em.  
  
So. These two examples of steroid abuse are givin' each other the evil eye for about a good two minutes before the 'leader' of the new group turns to the bar. Ah, more 'manly' strutting. Turnin' his back on the enemy, proving how little he cares. Course the whole effect is ruined what with him fondlin' the firearm he's got in his pocket.  
  
And suddenly..I have myself an idea.  
  
  
  
It takes a while. I have to nurse the entire pitcher of beer for hours before the time is right. By then it's warm and flat, but..with the lack of quality in it in the first place, I can't really tell the difference.  
  
Eventually however the two groups of 'gentlemen' have fallen prey to drink. They've been getting louder for the past hour and I've been listening to one complain about..something or other for some time. Just how I like em'. Angry and stupid.  
  
Let's see if I can be sneaky.  
  
I set my drink on the bar and slowly work my way over to the table where the fellow who I rightiously trounced at pool is still sitting.  
  
"Scuze me mate." I say interupting him. Him and his friends stare at me blearily. "Managed to aquire the funds to pay me what ya' owe?"  
  
The one I'm speaking too turns to his friends with a laugh. "Hey guys, check out Mr. Aussie here, he want's his money!"  
  
"British." I answer in a clipped voice.  
  
"Oh..I'm so sorry." The oaf laughs. "Corrections boys, he's British. That makes everythin' more difficult."  
  
"So do you got my money?" I ask feinging impatience and lean on the table just barely invading his personal space. Have to walk a careful line. I want to annoy him, not piss im' off.  
  
He stands up and I let him back me away from the table. He's bigger than I am and it takes actual effort to force myself to wilt a bit. I'm not used to playing this role.  
  
"You're an idiot" He pokes me in the chest, pushing me back, I willingly take a step. "You come round here, bother me," Pokes again. "Me and my friends will pay you back..outside. Catch my drift?"  
  
I look down at my feet. Demon is rattlin' it's cage. Gotta play this close though.  
  
"Yeah..yeah I getcha" I shuffle away and that comes back to me all to easily. Even after a century I still remember what it was like. Being weak, having to back down... I don't like it. In this case it's for a good purpose though. Fun.  
  
I meander back to the bar and make eye contact with one of the 'other' gang sitting thereabouts. He sneers at me disdainfully and mutters a few curse words. I catch '...fuckin' pussy..'  
  
I smile meekly and take my seat not looking away from the guy still laughing at me.  
  
"What?" I say quietly. "They're bigger than I am."  
  
He just shakes his head. "Yer..yer..not a man chum."  
  
No. No I'm not and if I ever have a good day I'll prove it to you.  
  
I look at my feet.  
  
"Could be worse." I mumble.  
  
"Wha' say?" The guy sitting next to me slurs.  
  
"It could've been worse." I repeat a little more loudly.  
  
"Yeah...right." He replies and turns back to his drink.  
  
"No..really." I press the point home. "I could have been like...like you."  
  
That gets his attention. He stands up and is in my face, I get a lungful of beer breath. Charmed!  
  
"Wha...wha.." He blinks a few times and starts over. "What's thas sssupposed to mean?"  
  
I think he's trying to look me in the eyes but he's so drunk it more appears as if he's studying my left ear. Which is just how I want him to be, drunk and stupid enough to believe me.  
  
"It means," And I smile. "It means that I coulda been like you squire. I at least don't have any younger sisters for the fellow over there to boast he 'carried home like a six pack' as he's doin' about your own."  
  
Maybe that sentence was a bit too long for the bloke. I watch him blink a few times to process it. Ah, there he goes...he's got it. You can tell, the cloudy film over his eyes just got torched by the ignition of internal rage. Okay it sputtered a few times but I think he's getting rightiously pissed!  
  
"Where...Where?" He roars stumbling about. I grab him and spin him around, shoving him in the right direction. "Over there mate. Have fun."  
  
He charges across the room screaming "Get Em' Guys!!!"  
  
His friends turn around confused but amble after him anyway only a few steps behind before he crashes into my playmates table knocking their drinks hither an' yon. I think his elbow catches my opponent in the face.  
  
I whisper to the air beside me. "Into the jaws of death rode the six hundred. Danger to the left of them, danger to the right of them. The charge of the Light..read idiotic..Brigade."  
  
The bartender is standing there with his mouth open. I try and wave him over but he seems to be in shock. I hear the sound of someone crashing into the ground but ignore it.  
  
"Scuse me." I rap the bar top with my knuckle. "Hey, over here. A little service please? Yoohoo!"  
  
His eyes snap to mine. "You..you..." He sputters. "You did this!"  
  
"Yeah!" I smile cheekily. "Great ain't it? Can I get another beer? Cold this time if it pleases you."  
  
"Wha..wha.." He gapes.  
  
"Might want to go to a speech doctor to have that checked out." I say helpfully. "Nasty stutter you got there."  
  
He ducks beneath the counter and comes back with a baseball bat. I shift and giving him my best teeth laden grin. "Don't." I command.  
  
"It'd ruin my fun, you don't want that." I lean over the counter so we're just inches apart. "Do you?"  
  
HIs eyes roll up in his head and I snatch the bat out of his hand before he collapses. Never had anyone actually faint on me before. Gives me a buzz, that or it's the beer...no. Definetly not this piss-water.  
  
I swing the bat a few times experimently. Really wish I could use it. Can admister some serious pain with a bat if you know how to use it. For now though it'll have to serve as just a prop so no one tries anything funny. I set is aside on the counter top and reach over to help myself to a bottle. Hmm...Johnny Walker. This'll do the trick.  
  
I swivel on my stool and watch as two fellows repeatedly slam another poor suckers head into the wall. I guess they're too drunk to realise they're pounding on their own friend. Ah well. It's chuckleworthy.  
  
"Cheers" I mumble saluting the room o'combat with the bottle pulling the top off with my teeth. I know you don't have too but...makes me feel macho.  
  
It doesn't take too much longer before everyone is down. One guy is still standing, barely. Everyone else is...not. I walk up to him. He's neither one o' my playmates but that's okay.  
  
"Congrats mate." I say. "Yer the winner."  
  
He wobbles a few times. "YEAH!" He shouts. "I win! I WIIINN!!"  
  
I give him a light tap of his forhead. He stumbles back, falls over one of his party pals, falls, stays down. Smart boy.  
  
"Yeah." I say wishing I could kick him a few times. "Yay you."  
  
Five minutes later I've helped myself to all the wallets and the money from the register. The grand total is a little over fourteen hundred.  
  
"Double or nothing." I growl pocketing the cash. "Double or nothing."  
  
Now, what does a gentleman like myself have to do to get something to eat around here? 


End file.
